Britney Spears' CD hits No. 1

Britney Spears' latest CD "Circus" is the No. 1 album after selling half a million copies last week, according to the AP:

The singer's comeback CD — actually, make that her second comeback CD — will top the album charts next week, according to her label, Jive. Though Nielsen SoundScan does not release its official figures until Wednesday, estimates have the record selling as many as 500,000 copies in its first week of release. "This is going to reinforce her icon status," said Barry Weiss, chairman and CEO of the BMG Label Group, which includes Spears' label. "It's not just a No. 1 album."

Britney's handlers already have a two-month tour planned starting in March, but is she ready? Sources for OK! Magazine say "Are you shitting me?":

"It is too much for her," an insider tells OK! of the star. "They packed her schedule too tight and now they're trying to find free time."
"She has the talent and the musical chops top pull it off, emotionally speaking, it's a little too soon," psychotherapist Dr. Jenn Berman, who does not treat Britney, tells OK!. "I don't think Britney will hit rock bottom, but it does leave her vulnerable to stress and burnout."

We're going to hear the "Is Britney ready to tour?" narrative ad nauseum until the thing launches in March, so let me just answer it definitively once and for all: HELL FUCKING NO. Unless, of course, the point of the tour is to make Britney think she's Mary Poppins again then be found days later using her children as boxing gloves in an underground cock fight. In which case, okay, yeah, start the bus.